#50randomthingsaboutme – after Melissa Laird’s Deportation and Yoga as my Recovery

    1. I’m still trying to recover from the shock treatment I received by ‘the system’ of court rules and procedures that resulted in Melissa Laird being dumped in Dulles Airport.
    2. I do find life much more interesting than fiction.
    3. I am addicted to Bikram Yoga – as the only way that’s worth doing to manage 40 years of chronic pain.
    4. I adore blogging and the magic of networking that the web provides.
    5. I always love Scarlet Wilde’s blog posts. Reading her #50randomthings inspired me to do this now.
    6. I am not typically German, because my father came from a Slavic minority called the ‘Sorbs’ who live in Lausatia.
    7. I don’t like to be shuffled into the ‘German box’.
    8. I love living in London.
    9. I love my courage and my enthusiasm.
    10. I am married to my computer, after having had four loves of my life. Two of them were married already. The fourth one actually married me but is not alive any more.
    11. I like to ‘follow my bliss’ and do things that turn me on.
    12. I had a dream that my pain would be gone by the end of the summer. That was last year. I wonder after which summer it will come true.
    13. I loved noticing that my French hadn’t disappeared when I visited CERN and Geneva after 30 years in London.
    14. I always try to be positive.
    15. But I do need to feel sad and sorry and cry and scream quite a bit. I guess that’s my father’s Slavic genes.
    16. I often am reminded of a German ballad that was about melting the king’s heart of stone. A father asks his son to gather all his strengths: his passions and his pains. That’s how I justify my chronic pains.
    17. I’d love to change the world. But I can only change myself.
    18. I’d rather change the money system than make money.  My husband used to say it takes money to make a difference.
    19. I believe that the universe knows what it’s doing with me and that I just have to kind of ‘listen’.
    20. After Yoga the other day I had Leonard Cohen’s Closing Time in my head. So I looked up the lyrics and was most intrigued.
    21. I prefer to be on my own than in bad company.
    22. I don’t like social chit chat.
    23. That’s why I prefer to lead a ‘social life with meaning‘.
    24. On Tuesday I was at IBM Hursley and took these photos.


      1. The middle photo advertised the event I attended. I felt like with EU and other ‘official’ documents: they always speak the right language but never seem to deliver what they write about.
      2. I’m amazed that WordPress can’t handle images within a numbered list.
      3. I feel as if I’m a globalised software tester without a job. Only an hour ago I told the webmaster of Virgin that I couldn’t register a comment on his.
      4. I do find the ‘magic of networking’ always the most amazing ‘food for thought’ and ‘sustenance for the soul’: Melissa told me that Virgin was collecting change for children. So I wanted to ask whether they could help Return our Stolen Children, e.g. Melissa’s then 4-year-old son who hasn’t seen his mum since December 2011, when they were separated.
      5. There is a German blog I admire because it was no 1 on a site that the blogger left and now he has had 23 million visitors! www.derhonigmannsagt.wordpress.com I’m glad that I also met him personally and showed him round our ‘honey villages’ in Havelland / Brandenburg.
      6. The English equivalent is the no bollocks man John Ward with his Slog blog. I love how he ‘has tooth’ even after having had 8 teeth pulled out!
      7. I love his ‘energetic wit’ but I am too German to have his kind of humour.
      8. I am very naive and idealistic on one hand but have become very cynical at the same time.
      9. I love living 6 tube stops away from Westminster.
      10. I only use Twitter really for broadcasting my WordPress posts.
      11. I got into using Facebook after the Return our Stolen Children outside Downing Street demo. This is the photo I took that keeps sitting in my heart.


    1. I really think that taking other people’s children is the most heinous of all white collar crimes. But what actually gets me even more is the institutionalised hypocrisy with which it’s meant to be ‘legally valid’ or justified! I learned about Perfidious Albion in the process.
    2. When I discovered ‘peace’ as an issue for the world in the late 70s and early 80s, I thought that is ‘politics’ and that means ‘men.
    3. Since then I’ve changed my mind! My dream of a ‘peace network’ of people and computers’ is still a major challenge!
    4. I seriously wonder what the world will be at by the time I die.
    5. All I can do is ‘my best’ until then. Every day.
    6. I’m glad a friend encouraged me to go to my Yoga session this afternoon. My feet hurt for now but I know it’s good healing pain that helps my poor body to better re-alignment.
    7. I am very irritable at times, e.g. when men think I should park my brain and follow theirs.
    8. When I notice I get irritated, I try to be calm but often enough need to shout.
    9. I do love the song I want to Sing, I want to Shout I want to Scream and I used it for a blog post.
    10. It seems that blogging is my outward reflection of my inner self-awareness.
    11. Recently I discovered differences between the English quotation of Martin Niemoeller and the German original, thanks to my cousin whom I recently visited in Leipzig – the town which moved me again deeply: first because of Schiller’s house where he wrote the Ode to Joy, then because of the golden egg to celebrate the Monday demos that started the revolution and then the 200-year anniversary of the battle of Leipzig re-animated in the largest panorama painting created by Iranian Yagadir Asisi.
    12. I love looking at flowers as I love feeding my soul with beauty.
    13. When I was too stressed today over poor Melissa, I listened to the most beautiful rendition of the Ave Maria by Schubert.
    14. I love ‘stumbling’ from inspiration to information and idea to insight.
    15. I am grateful for having had this opportunity of expressing my thoughts and feelings.



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6 thoughts on “#50randomthingsaboutme – after Melissa Laird’s Deportation and Yoga as my Recovery

  1. […] still trying to recover, wanting to sift through another bag of […]

  2. maureenjenner September 15, 2013 at 11:27 am Reply

    Sabine, I read your list – right to the very last one. Challenging as always. A pocket version of a pretty remarkable life in which sheer grit and dogged determination must have been requisite ingredients. Here’s to their continuing power!

    • Sabine Kurjo McNeill September 19, 2013 at 7:21 pm Reply

      Many thanks, Maureen!

      I just did it off the cuff and it’s interesting what you retain as essence!

  3. […] #50randomthingsaboutme – after Melissa Laird’s Deportation and Yoga as my Recovery (sabinemcneill.co.uk) […]

  4. […] uploaded these pictures on #50randomthingsaboutme after having been inspired by men will pause. I feel about IBM like I feel about the EU: they […]

  5. Ardjuna September 18, 2013 at 4:01 pm Reply

    I love Leonard Cohen a song for every mood and with Jennifer Warnes a beautiful combination xx

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